Press play to listen to me read this essay.
i’ve had a few friends as me about my recent solo trip to Packwood, Washington. it also felt fun to write about travel, which is what i find myself wanting to write more about, so here’s this! :)
i’ve been solo tripping in Oregon since i was young. as a teenager, i took day trips out to the coast sometimes multiple times a month. i’ve been camping by myself a few times (in populated sites), and traveled through Central America and Europe alone. i also take after my grandfather and dad in that i LOVE road trips. one of my favorites was a trip i took to Utah to visit a friend and hike through the national parks in the southern part of the state. in 2021, despite being very unsure where my paychecks were going to come from, i began taking solo trips seasonally, as a rule. i figured solitude and nature were going to be the fuel to keep my fire going during times of deep healing and self doubt. and it hasn’t steered me wrong yet.
sometimes i’ll set the intention of going for a work or creative retreat, but mostly, i just go without any agenda. solo tripping is an incredible integration tool. it supports rewilding and reconnecting with what truly brings you pleasure1 and joy.
i don’t think we realize how much energetic lint we walk around with in our daily lives, even when things are moving along nicely. and these days its pretty rare that things are moving along nicely. we need to come up for air. we need to remember what silence sounds like and what muting the buzz of a city can do for our ability to really, really listen. we need time to be with the earth, to get as quiet as a fern and become immersed by the wonder of the natural ecosystem. our systems are screaming for it.
ecopsychology2 is an emerging field that seeks to heal our separateness from the natural world. our wellness is inextricable from the wellbeing of the planet and vice-versa. that is interconnectedness, after all. and solo tripping is a powerful way to to re-balance our relationship with the earth.
and so i like to book my trips with lots of access to nature for anywhere from 2-3 nights at a lovely, small, and modest airbnb within 1-4 hours drive of P ortland. in the not too far future, i hope to take more of these by train and splurge a little on accommodations here and there, but the magic isn’t in the amenities, for me the magic is in the alone time.
the question i get most from friends is: what do you do the whole time?
my answer is always: anything i want.
i like myself. i like being by myself. i love and need solitude. so when i solo trip, i like to have the best time with me. i follow my body around: slowing, feeling, delighting, pleasuring, and creating.
i should be clear, solo tripping is full spectrum. if you’ve got some shit you need to feel, express, or work through, you’re gonna go there tucked away in a cabin by yourself. if you’ve got energy to let out of your body, i invite you to get it out. you might end up jumping like you’re a teenager in your bedroom listening to blink 182. who cares? what needs to come out probably will, and that’s a GREAT thing.
anyway, i thought i’d offer up some solo tripping tips in case they resonate for you. i’ll share a little bit about:
planning and accommodation
what to bring
safety
small delights
if there’s more you wanna know, please ask below! as the internet goes, this is a lovely space to engage if that’s your thing.
PLANNING and ACCOMMODATION
TIME BLOCK : block out a weekend of your schedule every season or two seasons this year well ahead of time. i sometimes set calendar reminders to myself to do this throughout the year. i also sometimes forget, and that can lead to happy accidents. if you can take a mid-week (eg. wed-fri), or weekend to week break (sun-tues), do it. you may be able to find a better nightly rate. and if you’re into astrology or moon cycles, that might be something you want to take into consideration as well.
LODGING : i’m an airbnb girl. sometimes i use booking.com. i’m sure there are other apps and sites for finding places to stay (my brother recommended Hotel Tonight recently). if you want something in high demand, obviously its better to book ahead. i also love what i find when i wait a little bit and remain flexible about where i land. airbnb also has less expensive rates the closer you get to the booking date as well as for weeknight stays. use the wishlist feature and create categories by region (i have ‘oregon coast’, ‘the gorge’, ‘mountain/forest’ wishlists, for instance).
OFF THE BEATEN PATH : i do adore rural and quiet towns for solo trips. they help me return to the speed of nature and the REAL speed of my body. but don’t feel stuck in the “middle of nowhere” — take day trips! maybe you drive into the adorable town of Silverton from your airbnb located in the even tinier town Bethany where your home base is. no rules.
GREET THE HOUSE + LAND : if you’re spiritual, sensitive to energies, or attuned to the fact that the land you’re on belongs to indigenous stewards, some arriving ritual might feel right to you. you may already have a strong sense of what this might be for you, or it might feel really awkward. in fact, this whole idea might feel completely disingenuous to you. feel into it. you can take or leave all or anything from this brief description of what i’ve been doing recently. i clear the space with sustainable palo santo and greet the four directions and elements. i introduce myself to the house spirits and the land. i pull a card or spread. i take my time moving into the space, unpacking thoughtfully and setting up a simple altar.
WHAT TO BRING
all of the usual things you would bring on an overnight trip for yourself and… journals · snacks · instruments · art supplies · cannabis · tarot or oracle cards · two books · vibrators · microdoses · weather appropriate attire · portable speaker · cozies · face mask · nail polish · craft project · colors · outfit for nice evening outing (just in case) · yoga mat · bolsters · blanket · warm socks + slippers · crystals · chocolate · tea · · · · ·
the list goes on. i don’t always bring everything on this list, but i usually do. and it’s worth it. leave the extra clothes behind and bring all the creature comforts.
i imagine one of the more challenging things for some about traveling alone is the idea of enjoying a meal alone. maybe that sounds like the opposite of enjoyable for you, and that might be something to be curious about. but expect a period of time working through some anxiety. notice how quickly and how long you want to be on your phone (do you want phone boundaries?). when this anxiety fades, the pay off is lovely. to help you settle into more comfort, you might bring along a few loose ideas for what you’ll do while you enjoy a meal or snack alone. here are some if they’re helpful:
dream or vision board on paper
write to writing prompts or journal entries
read a book
listen to an album you’ve been wanting to sit down with
order yourself a treat mocktail or glass of wine
plan a spontaneous, fun activity during your trip, read travel guides, make reservations, etc.
also, sit down in that enticing restaurant or cafe even if you’re not hungry. enjoy a beverage, people watch — just be.
SAFETY
this will be very incomplete, but here are some of the things i’ve been thinking about, have noticed, and have practiced for myself around safety. feel free to share more thoughts below.
generally, yes, i do feel less safe when i travel alone now than when i did when i was younger. is this growing out of that youthful naïveté? is this because there are more real or perceived threats to my brown female body now than in the past? maybe a little bit of both. please remember that there are more possible threats than other people in the world like nature (unexpected bad weather), animals (a cougar will fuck you up), yourself (double check candles if you light them), and your mind (are the stories you’re telling true?).
here are some of my tips:
i let my partner know where i’m going for the day and check in (could be a friend!)
i leave places immediately or quickly where the energy doesn’t feel right
i allow myself to be pleasantly surprised by people and places
i stay aware of my surroundings and call in more vigilance
i don’t really talk to people
i check the weather ahead and while i’m there
i refresh my memory about how to react in case of bear or cougar and bring spray
i turn around from a path on a hike if i feel like i shouldn’t keep going
i make sure i have lots of water and snacks on me
i think about daylight hours and how long an outdoor excursion might take
i revisit a cafe or restaurant i really like to create a second energetic home base
i carry around a strong “don’t fuck with me” vibe
i trust myself, my body, and my instincts
Mt Ranier National Forest
SMALL DELIGHTS
you do not have to spend a bunch of money to have really great time. i’ve enjoyed a couple of solo trips where i stayed in the airbnb the whole time and took some leisurely walks around the property. when you bring the creature comforts, delights, food, and drinks that nourish you, you’re gonna feel like a queen.
our culture makes believe we need so much more in the this life than we really do. on trips when i don’t have a lot of financial resources, i turn more attention inward. i find pleasure and satisfaction in the delight of laying on the floor in delicious positions for as long as i want, knowing that i don’t have anywhere to be. i buy an extra crispy and soft baguette to enjoy with brie. i sit on the patio or by a window with a lovely view for an hour or more. i let the small, sensual delights be the things that i’m also there to do and see. in my experience, a return to the senses is a powerful element of solo tripping.
even though i sometimes experience discomfort or even moments of boredom (yay, boredom!), i leave the experience feeling reset. i have a deeper connection to my creature nature, my healing process, my creative expression, my body, and what fun feels like to me.
and when i come home, there’s space to re-pattern. i see things a little or a lot differently. and isn’t that the point of travel and adventure? to come back changed? let the earth change you, love. we’re desperate for it.
Discussion Prompts: Thanks for saying hi to me and one another!
When was the last time you took a solo trip? What was your experience like? Where did you go?
What stories, thoughts, or emotions come up in you when you think about a solo trip?
What are your solo tripping tips?
Journal Prompts
List some locations or areas between 1-4 hours of where you live that sound appealing for your own adventure. Select one and write down a vision for what that trip could be.
Get all of your anxieties about taking a solo trip down on paper. Then get all of your daydreams and excitements about taking a solo trip down, too.
https://www.pacifica.edu/degree-program/community-liberation-ecopsychology/ecopsychology/